First Hand Embarrassment! Never Let Them Catch You Slippin’

Yesterday, I had one of those moments that I will probably never forget.

I was invited to a founder’s luncheon, where I was surrounded by prominent bank owners, business owners, executives, and people operating at an extremely high level. This was the kind of room where everyone seemed polished, intentional, and prepared.

And there I was…

An etiquette coach… confused about my forks.

Yes. Me. Coach Ahava.

Let me tell you what happened.

We were seated for lunch, and there were multiple forks beside my plate. I knew exactly what they were supposed to be used for: the salad fork and the entrée fork.

But there was one problem.

I didn’t have my glasses.

I looked down at those forks, and in that moment, my confidence disappeared because I couldn’t clearly see the difference between them. I felt pressured at that moment in time.

So what did I do? I just picked up a fork and started eating. By the time I was finished, I realized something.

I used my entrée fork for my salad…

…and then I used my salad fork for my entrée.

Whew.

As an etiquette coach, I was embarrassed.

I kept thinking, “Oh my goodness. Everybody around me probably knows exactly what they’re doing.”

And honestly, they probably did.

But here’s the bigger lesson I walked away with:

Knowing something and being prepared to demonstrate it in real life are two different things. Plus me being nervous didn’t help either.

That moment reminded me that refinement isn’t about being perfect. It’s about being prepared.

It also reminded me that sometimes the smallest details can expose whether or not we are prepared for the room we’re entering.

And that’s why I want to share five ways to NEVER LET THEM CATCH YOU SLIPPING.

1. Know the Room You’re Walking Into

Before you attend an event, luncheon, dinner, networking event, or business meeting, find out what you’re walking into.

Who will be there?

What’s the dress code?

What is the expected level of professionalism?

Will it be casual, business casual, cocktail, formal, or fine dining?

The more you understand the environment, the more prepared you’ll feel when you arrive.

Don’t wait until you get in the room to figure out the room.

2. Prepare Before You Arrive

Preparation creates confidence.

If you know you’re attending a formal luncheon, refresh yourself on dining etiquette beforehand.

Review table settings.

Review introductions.

Review professional greetings.

Review conversation etiquette.

And if you’re attending a networking event, make sure you know how to introduce yourself and talk about what you do.

Preparation doesn’t make you fake.

Preparation makes you ready.

3. Carry What You Need

This one humbled me.

BRING YOUR GLASSES!

😂

Seriously.

If you need glasses to see clearly, bring them.

Don’t assume you’ll be fine without them.

Your preparation should include the little things that help you function at your best.

Your glasses.

Your business cards.

Your notebook.

Your phone charger.

Your lipstick.

Whatever you personally need to show up polished and prepared.

Sometimes “slipping” isn’t because you don’t know something.

Sometimes you simply didn’t bring what you needed.

4. Don’t Be Afraid to Slow Down

When you’re nervous, you can move too quickly.

You start watching everyone else.

You start second-guessing yourself.

You start thinking, “Am I doing this right?”

And that’s when mistakes happen.

Slow down.

Observe.

Take your time.

Look around the table.

Pay attention.

And if you’re unsure, discreetly observe what is happening around you.

Confidence doesn’t always mean knowing exactly what to do.

Sometimes confidence means being calm enough to figure it out.

5. Keep Learning—No Matter How Much You Already Know

This was probably the biggest lesson for me.

I am an etiquette coach, but I am still a student.

There is always another room to enter, another skill to sharpen, and another level to grow into.

Your title doesn’t exempt you from learning.

Your experience doesn’t exempt you from preparation.

And your expertise doesn’t mean you will never have an awkward moment.

In fact, sometimes the moments that embarrass us the most teach us the lessons we remember the longest.

Yesterday reminded me that etiquette isn’t simply knowing which fork to use.

It’s about awareness, preparation, confidence, observation, and grace.

And yes…

I absolutely know the difference between a salad fork and an entrée fork.

😂

But yesterday, I learned something even more important:

Never assume that knowing something means you’re prepared for every situation.

Prepare.

Practice.

Pay attention.

Bring what you need.

And walk into every room ready to represent yourself well.

Because you never know who is watching.

You never know who you’re sitting beside.

You never know what opportunity could come from that table.

And most importantly—

Never let embarrassment stop you from entering the room.

Sometimes you have to be willing to sit at the table, make a mistake, learn from it, and come back even more prepared the next time.

That’s refinement.

That’s growth.

And that’s the real lesson I took from yesterday’s luncheon.

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—Coach Ahava